Phoenix Down Under: Ask Steve

It's time I get down and funky with some of the frequently asked questions I get; and for me, 'frequently asked' refers to any number over zero. Still, a few people have asked me some questions relating to myself, games, and Australia (negating the fact I had to coerce these out of them), so let's get to it.

Question one: Who the freckenstein are you?

I'm Steve Rosenburg; A 'freelance' video game writer who someday wishes to work professionally in the industry. Being that the industry is so competitive, that might prove to be difficult. Plus, I have a long way to go in terms of my writing style/skill. Perhaps I'll settle for astronaut or fireman. Possibly law, but I'll still do this in my free time until I keel over... or until The Man breaks my door down.

Dear Dr. Steve, How much does the Australian censorship of games really affect gamers? I always hear about it, but to what extent does it actually affect people? - Xeon

Good question, Xeon. If that is your real name. In Australia, the censorship of video games and the impact of said censorship varies from game to game. Some titles are simply 'refused classification' on the grounds that they contain 1) boobs 2) bone fragments protruding from skulls 3) hard drugs 4) Julia Gillard's voice, etc. This means that the game simply does not receive a classification (eg. M15+, PG13) which is something that every piece of entertainment requires in order to be viewed, by law.

Overall the impact is not a significant one. Generally the game is altered in order to be sold in Australia, unless you're the makers of the Alien vs Predator game, in which case a middle finger to the ratings board is acceptable. An example of censorship can be seen in Left 4 Dead - the censorship board didn't look too kindly on the player being able to kill riot police zombies, and so they had to be removed from the game altogether. Hopefully we'll see an 18+ rating soon.

What's it like having a summery Christmas? Are the ads like... beach oriented? Do you have different Christmas music for it? Or... do you still hear how it's a white winter wonderland? - Jason

I'd really like it to snow here (in more places) to be honest. Then I could snowboard again. Our songs are largely just your songs, but one that comes to mind is that one about driving in an ute through the bush, instead of a sleigh through snow. Speaking of which...

Can you ship me a Holden UTE, any year or trim line with a V8 and 6 speed should do just fine. :) (seriously, I want one really bad) - Ryan

If you can fly a carrier helicopter over here to pick it up, sure. Alternatively, a very large boat. Also, a ton of your dead presidents, with which to purchase some of our dead poets and such, and eventually the car.

Are games marketed well in Australia? Like... do you see many ads for them throughout different forms of media (tv, internet, billboards, etc)? - Jason

Internet? Oh my, yes. Since Google spies on you, the ads I see are very geared towards an Australian audience. As for billboards, no. Games aren't big enough to warrant that over here... although perhaps in some cities, but even then it would likely just be Modern Warfare or something.

What is your key media source for all things video games in Australia, I understand that the internet can reach anywhere. However, for example IGN are Gamespot located in San Fransico, California. What is the biggest Australian run video game media outlet? - Marcus Twattycakes

Probably IGN Australia. Or Kotaku Australia. We don't really have any large ones that are based here, at least not that I know of... Australian Gamer may not be a huge outlet, but it's my personal favourite for keeping up with gaming stuff for Australians. Hyper magazine is also good - it's one of the few gaming magazines worth buying.

Hey there Steve, how does it feel knowing that your name will always personally be read by me as St. Eve and I will picture as a woman? - Samuel Gigaballs

Pure ecstasy.

Dear St. Eve,
What do you think of fellow Australian gaming magnate, Yahtzee? - Samuel Gigaballs

Well, he's actually British. He just lives in Australia. He's one of my gaming journalism heroes, along with those guys from Extra Credits. His work influences mine quite a bit, especially his weekly Extra Punctuation column, but of course I have a ways to go to catch up to him. I likely never will. I've always wanted to travel to Brisbane in the hopes of seeing him at the Mana Bar and gawking. And the cocktails, of course. Oh, and there are games there too.

Hey Steve, what is OS of choice and what media player(s) do you use? - Guybrush Threepwood

I'm going to be on the receiving end of a lot of nerd rage here. Vista is my operating system, and I don't mind it despite all of the hate. I also use iTunes to listen to my music. I have tried Winamp, but always go back to iTunes for some reason. Even though it sucks up memory like nothing else. Get this, I also buy my music. From the iTunes store no less. I can taste your anger.

Hey there sex pot, what is the absolute worst game you have ever played from start to finish? What made it more compelling to finish than other bad games you've given up on? - Chad sexington

ModNation racers, I suppose. It wasn't that bad, but the load times were excruciatingly long and the AI was as dumb as a lobotomized mule. As soon as you'd be doing too well for its liking, bam. Fifty tier-three weapons are chasing down your booty, similar to what I do when I roam the streets.

I guess I was still compelled to finish it because of the humorous cut-scenes and whatnot. And I loved unlocking things for my character. Nice hats and so forth.

Hey Steve! Were video games a big part of your childhood? Are there any games you wish you could re-experience as your child self? - Pvt. Public

Yes. Many social interactions were sacrificed so that I could play Super Mario 64, Perfect Dark, Banjo Kazooie and the rest. It's probably part of why I'm here writing this, instead of being successful. I suppose I'd go with Pokemon Red and Blue. Well, not both of them, that's a little too much.

Hey Steve, what's a video game idea that's been floating in your head that you're fond of? - Lotta Sexton

Unfortunately I don't really have one. I occasionally give people input on their ideas, like this one guy that posted his fighting game idea on a forum. I stayed with that thread for ages, but I think I scared the guy off in the end.

Hey Steve, who's the most annoying video game character in your opinion? - Holden MaGroin

Rico from Killzone 2. I want him dead.

Hey Steve, any gaming going on at the moment? - Leviticus Bumhoard

I'm playing some Call of Duty 4 to get hyped for Black Ops, and soon I hope to buy Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn for the Wii.

What are your influences? - Chesty Whipper

A combination of Yahtzee Croshaw and David Wong. But I fall short of both of them.